Category: Life


2 months without socials

Some updates since my last post.

I’m feeling much better these days, Alhamdulillah. Remember those backaches and shoulder pains? Well, I’ve now made exercising a daily habit (30 minutes to 1 hour every single day!), and it’s a world of difference. My husband surprised me with an Apple Watch for the New Year, and let me tell you, it’s been a game-changer in keeping me on track with my fitness goals.

I guess this has been made possible – in fact, many changes in my life lately have been made possible since I take a conscious decision to step back from social media since mid-December. One of the biggest reasons was that I couldn’t handle the heartbreaking Gaza stories anymore. They were taking a toll on my mental health. I’ve deleted all social and news apps from my phone. It’s been tough but necessary for my well-being. I feel bad for not knowing about my brothers and sisters and for not spreading awareness about the occupation and war. The guilt lingers in my daily life. In my prayers.

But being away from social media has given me the space to focus on what truly matters to me. I’ve found renewed motivation to strengthen my faith and prepare myself for what lies ahead. Not sure how this is going to sound, but I’m committed to training myself to be a strong and better Muslim, ready to protect my faith, my family, and humanity. It’s become my driving force to improve in all aspects of my life.

I hope this is not just early-of-the-year-goals thing; I read and write more. I’ve been trying to practice more Sunnah regularly, and I’ve enrolled in an Islamic study certificate class and a Tadabbur support group. Plus, thanks to my mother-in-law, I’ve been spending more time each day learning the Quran in a fun and interactive way through the ThinkQuran app. The app costs hundreds (Alhamdulillah, Mama yang bayar), it’s really really good.

At times, it seems like I’m doing so many things at once, but at least for the moment that I’m doing all these things, I’m grateful to always be learning. Doakan saya istiqamah.

With priorities in focus, the trivialities of my once-existing problems—office politics and toxic people—seem insignificant. I find myself more at peace, not easily agitated by small issues. My husband enjoys this a lot, I know, because he doesn’t have to listen to my rants so much these days.

Knowing that I’m doing my best brings me a sense of contentment, even though I’m aware that life is fragile and unpredictable.

In the end, I’m grateful for the opportunities to grow and improve, and I’m determined to make the most of every moment I have. Here’s to living with purpose and giving our best, every single day.


Too early for the 2023 recap.

Seriously, 2023 has been a whirlwind of craziness.

Work has been a wild rollercoaster, with four work trips back and forth to Borneo, and one conference trip to the Philippines! Talk about some serious air miles. On top of that, we’ve been hustling hard in the office, bidding adieu to the work-from-home era. As the workload piled up, I found myself speaking up more and being true to myself. Oh, and did I mention my style upgrade? Yep, I’m rocking square scarves and a whole lot more colors these days. Can’t believe I don’t rely so much on the black hijab anymore.

Beyond the nine-to-five grind, family time has been my saving grace, with my ever-so-romantic-yet-occasionally-annoying husband, frequent girls’ day out with Hannah, and boys’ day out with El Amer and Hannan. Alhamdulillah. This year, we’ve hit up the Lost World of Tambun and kicked back at a chill villa in Port Dickson with the kids. To make life easier, we brought in a driver for the kids and even hired a maid. Less chores, more quality time. Turns out, it’s cheaper to have someone cook for us daily than ordering in all the time. Win-win!

But it’s not all rainbows and sunshine. Physically, I’m feeling the weight of time creeping up on me. Those backaches and shoulder pains from sitting at my desk all day? Yeah, they’re not going away anytime soon. On the upside, my spiritual and emotional game is getting better (I think). I’ve found a different kind of peace in my spiritual routines, and my PMS isn’t throwing me for a loop as often. It’s done wonders for my relationship with the old ball and chain, too. Breakdowns and tantrums? Yeah, they’re a thing of the past.

Now, financially, it’s a bit of a gray area. We’re not exactly living hand-to-mouth, but we’re not stashing away the big bucks either. Maybe it’s time to get serious about saving up for that rainy day, huh?

…and the most recent thing, the situation in Gaza has hit me hard. It’s tough to watch from afar and feel like there’s not much I can do. But that doesn’t stop me from doing what I can. Sharing social media posts, donating what I can spare, and sending some prayers their way—it’s the least I can do. It’s a stark reminder of how unfair life can be for some, and it’s hard not to feel a bit guilty about all the good things in my life.

You know, this whole thing has got me thinking. We all need to be ready for whatever life throws at us. With everything going on in the world, it’s clear that anything can happen at any time. It’s a wake-up call for all of us to stick together and be there for each other, no matter where we come from.

In the end, I truly believe that even the smallest acts of kindness can make a difference. It’s a reminder that even though we might not be able to change the whole world, we can still make an impact in our own way. So, here’s to spreading some love and hope in a world that could use a little more of both.


5+ Things I Can’t Live Without, as a Minimalist (Apocalypse Version)

The pandemic makes me learn one of the most valuable lessons – tough times get you to reconsider what’s important in your life, general priority likes the relationships, different type of commitments you put yourself into and worldly materials.

Staying at home most of the time during the earlier period when COVID-19 hits, I realise that I don’t really need stuff. If I were to pack a bag to go through this kind of period again, these are the things that I would bring with me.


I am short-sighted, with a prescription degree of -5.75 dioptres for both sides. When I first wake up every morning, I need the aid to see clearly. So I need my glasses. During the day now, I wear contact lenses because they feel more comfortable with my hijab, as glasses tend to cause me headache as I slip them under my hijab. Lenses also make me look prettier but most probably it will be harder to manage wearing contact lenses daily in a apocalypse time or war-zone.

Phone or laptop

I want to be able to write every day and, of course, consume, i.e. reading, reading the Quran, listening to audio content and watching videos. Right now, I do the consuming part with my phone, and the creating is always done with my laptop. However, I’m not sure if electricity and internet are still available during a chaotic time.

Pen and paper

So let’s say I can’t have a phone or a laptop, then let’s get even more basic. A pen and paper, whether a notebook, journal or paper in loose form. Every day, even in the age that people mostly do things digitally, I do ‘thinking’ with a pen on paper. They are like my second brain or an extension of myself and storage.

I pray that I will have access to pens and papers till the day I die.


While listing this down, my body is surged with gratefulness because all my life, I have always slept on a comfortable bed that I cannot imagine myself sleeping on the floor or thinly layered and uncomfortable bedding with no privacy. At the very least, I need some space or corner I can call my own. For the apocalypse, I will sleep with a sleeping bag under the bridge, in a big old cupboard, or perhaps under a big table.

Shariah compliance clothings

If I can only have one thing, this is it.

I need clothing to cover my body, pray and go out to see the world.

For shoes, perhaps I can live with a pair of slippers. (Malaysia’s climate being equatorial, hot and humid throughout the year, you don’t really need shoes unless you’re the jungle people. Oh well, jungle people are probably bare-footed.)

Something extra that is nice to have – Beauty products.

Alright, I know this is cheating, as I put five (5) in the title, and some of you might think this is not as important, especially during the apocalypse. But I do need beauty products to have a good day which includes a toothbrush, toothpaste, shower foam, shampoo, facial cleanser, moisturiser, sunblock, and lipstick.

Perhaps I can simplify by using the same liquid cleanser/soap for the body, hair and face, and then again, something a bit extra, the moisturiser, and lipstick. I’ve been wearing them daily since I was in high school. To lose them is like losing part of my identity.

Knowing my bare minimum

Looking at this list, I came to learn that this is my bare minimum – I can survive with just these 5-6 items. So, whenever I’m making excuses for things I don’t have in my life to progress further, this post will remind me that I already have everything.

/No, nobody will survive the apocalypse when it’s going to happen/