Don’t complain you don’t have enough time if what you’re doing all night, and all weekends is watching House of Cards and playing games for three hours.” – Gary Vaynerchuk
This quote by Gary Vaynerchuk resonates deeply with me, emphasizing how our addiction to certain unproductive activities can significantly impact our daily lives. These habits act as time thieves—whether it’s binge-watching TV shows, getting lost in YouTube videos, or endlessly scrolling through social media. Sometimes, it’s challenging to understand why we become addicted to certain activities and not others.
I recently watched a TED Talk by Zoë Chance, titled “How to Make a Behavior Addictive,” which provided some clarity on this topic. Chance explains that for a behavior to become addictive, it must fulfill at least three of the six human needs identified by Tony Robbins:
1. Certainty
Certainty refers to our need for stability and predictability in our lives. This need is about feeling safe and comfortable, knowing what to expect. When we engage in activities that consistently deliver predictable results, they can become addictive because they provide a sense of control and security. For example, watching a favorite TV show or following a daily routine offers this sense of certainty.
2. Uncertainty
Uncertainty, or variety, is the counterbalance to certainty. While we need stability, we also crave new experiences and challenges to keep life exciting. This need for surprise and novelty is why people enjoy trying new activities, exploring different places, or taking risks. It’s this element of unpredictability that can make certain behaviors, like gambling or trying out new games, highly addictive.
3. Significance
Significance is the need to feel important, unique, and respected. We all want to feel valued and special. This need drives us to achieve and excel in various aspects of our lives, whether it’s in our careers, hobbies, or personal achievements. Activities that boost our self-esteem and make us feel accomplished, such as receiving praise or winning a competition, can become addictive because they fulfill our desire for significance.
4. Connection
Connection, or love and belonging, is about forming meaningful relationships with others. Humans are inherently social beings, and we need to feel connected to others to thrive. This need for connection can manifest through friendships, romantic relationships, family bonds, or being part of a community. Activities that foster these connections, like social media interactions or participating in group activities, can become addictive because they provide emotional support and a sense of belonging.
5. Growth
Growth is the need for continual development and improvement. This encompasses emotional, intellectual, and spiritual growth. We strive to better ourselves, learn new skills, and expand our horizons. Engaging in activities that promote personal growth, such as education, self-improvement practices, or challenging ourselves with new goals, can be highly fulfilling and, consequently, addictive because they make us feel more competent and capable.
6. Contribution
Contribution is about giving back and making a positive impact on others. This need combines aspects of growth and connection, emphasizing the importance of helping others and feeling that our actions matter. When we contribute to the well-being of others, we experience a deep sense of fulfillment and purpose. Activities that allow us to contribute, such as volunteering, mentoring, or creating something valuable for others, can become addictive because they make us feel useful and significant.
In her talk, Zoë shared her experience of becoming addicted to a pedometer, to the point of obsessively counting her steps until she injured herself. She connected this obsession to the six human needs, illustrating how even a simple device like a pedometer can fulfill these needs and become addictive. She also related these concepts to the phenomenon of flash mobs, showing how these events went from obscure to viral by fulfilling these fundamental human needs.
While my initial goal was to understand how to stop an addiction, Zoë concluded her speech by encouraging the audience to establish good habits using this framework. By understanding how a positive habit can fulfill our human needs, we can create a more rewarding and satisfying life.
In summary, Zoë’s insights make perfect sense and offer a valuable perspective on understanding and managing addictive behaviors.
Leave a Reply